Introduction: In this article, Mary Harrell-Sesniak searches old newspapers to find Halloween jokes that made our ancestors chuckle. Mary is a genealogist, author and editor with a strong technology background.
Just for fun, here are a few jokes to celebrate Halloween I found in GenealogyBank’s Historical Newspaper Archives.
See if you can guess the answers to these Halloween jokes – then read the rest of this article, where newspaper clippings provide the answers.
| (1846) Why is a grave-yard like a counter? | |
| (1865) Why is a spider a good correspondent? | |
| (1871) Why is a coffin like an axe with a dull edge? | |
| (1872) Why do carpenters charge more for coffins than for tables and chairs? | |
| (1885) Why is a ghost up a tree like a man eating his dinner? |
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| (1899) Why is a grave-digger like a waterman? | |
| (1900) Why is a ghost like a muffin? |
From 1846
Q: Why is a grave-yard like a counter?
A: Because it’s the place where you must “down with your dust [money, or gold dust].”
From 1865
Q: Why is a spider a good correspondent?
A: Because he drops a line by every post.
From 1871
Q: Why is a coffin like an axe with a dull edge?
A: Because it has to be ground before it is used.
From 1872
Q: Why do carpenters charge more for coffins than chairs and tables?
A: “Because people won’t bring coffins back to us to be repaired.”
From 1885
Q: Why is a ghost up a tree like a man eating his dinner?
A: Because he’s a goblin up the hash [ash tree].
From 1899
Q: Why is a grave-digger like a waterman?
A: He handles the skulls [sculling, i.e., rowing].
From 1900
Q: Why is a ghost like a muffin?
A: They are both fancy bred (bread).
Happy Halloween!
Hope everyone enjoys the fun day, but please be safe and remember: it can be a very boo-tiful day! Just don’t go goblin up too much of your kid’s candy!